Home > Just for Fun > What if fortune cookies were realistic?

What if fortune cookies were realistic?

So last night my wife and I were talking about a fortune I got in my fortune cookie a few months ago.  It gave me some hope that I would find a job and everything would be good.  A few months later and it didn’t come true.  So I was thinking what would the fortune cookie fortunes look like if they were realistic?  Here are a few of the ones that I came up with.  If you have some other original ones, send me a comment and I will add some of the best ones.  A big thank you to my wife for helping me remember the ones I came up with and for coming up with some clever ones of her own.  Enjoy!

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  1. Lisa
    July 2, 2011 at 4:24 am

    One of you major appliance will die—two days after the warranty expires.

    That cute little puppy that you just *couldn’t* resist and just *had* to have? It’s going to grow up to be a 100-lb dog with a learning disability when it comes to house breaking.

    One night at a party you’ll find yourself “in love” with an unusual, yet compelling woman. Walk away. Her name used to be Kevin.

  2. Rachel
    August 12, 2011 at 7:45 am

    The first one is my favorite. When is Jennifer going to start making and selling these realistic fortune fortune cookies? Ill order one box.

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